OK, so a while back, I tried to do a Pay it Forward contest. It was shortly after I moved from diaryland to here, and my already small readership was a bit off-kilter. And the response was decidedly underwhelming. As in – not a single taker. Perhaps part of the problem was that it was a handmade contest – all prizes had to be something you made yourself. And while I got a great bag from Magpie, I got no response whatsoever (and I promised to send a “Pay it Back” gift which I swear I am still planning on doing, but I suck very much and am slow in the creative, make it yourself department).
So anyway, Swistle coordinated another PIF contest and I clicked and read and then pretended like my phone was ringing and someone was at the door and lalalalalala I can’t hear you or anything about your contests. But I can’t help it – it’s fun. So late to the party, I am having another PIF contest. This time, the prizes don’t’ have to be handmade, because that adds a little to much work and responsibility to the mix and a quick look around my house will tell you how I feel about those things. This time around, I’m following Swistle’s lead and going with a random mystery prize. It may be one thing, it may be a bunch of things. It won’t be expensive. It will most likely be silly and quirky. It will reflect me and if possible, you (if I can figure you out based on what you write).
It would be awesome if the winner would do a little PIF themselves, but I am not even requiring it, because fuck it – I just want to have some fun here.
And in the name of fun, I am using a little true/false quiz to determine the winner. Leave your answers in the comments and the person with the best score will win. I the event that there is a tie, I will do the random thing. And who knows – if I get a good response (hahahahaha – I crack myself up) I may go all crazypants and have more than one winner. Because I just roll like that.
I’ll keep it open until Friday.
Notice: Hedge – as you live in my head, you are not eligible.
1. I competed on a men’s sports team.
2. I attended three different colleges before graduating.
3. I speak fluent French.
4. I had a job showing photographs to pigeons.
5. I’ve never gotten a speeding ticket.
6. I have a photo on my desk of me and Barry Manilow.
7. I once got a fishing hook through my nipple and had to have it cut out.
8. I did psychedelics as part of an experiment.
9. I made out with Eddie Money.
10. I won an ice cream eating contest.
11. I was second in my graduating class.
12. I got a leech on me while on acid and lost my shit.
13. I once got bitten by a big-ass monkey.
14. I started talking at 6 months.
15. I once shaved my head.
16. There are photos of me in a medical journal.
17. I have a tattoo of Mickey Mouse.
18. I had to be escorted to my car after being racially harassed in a bar.
19. My diving career ended when my friend threw me in a pile of broken glass.
20. I was mugged by a gang of teenagers.
21. With 6 months to go, mr b and I decided to scrap the wedding plans and get married in Vegas.
22. I failed high school trigonometry.
23. I once got a bowling ball stuck on my thumb for three hours.
24. I once told a priest to suck it.
25. I have traveled across the country to see the Grateful Dead.
26. I have visible needle marks on my arms.
27. I had a mullet.
28. My middle name is Michael.
29. I was suspended from school several times.
30. I was once run over by a chariot.
31. I have a platinum record.
32. I am really good at canoeing.
33. I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.