You Guys Are AWESOME!


I have the best friends in the world, even though I have never even met some of you. Within minutes of letting my Twitter and Plurk pals, I had an entire group of amazing people rally around me and take steps to stop the blog thief. And it worked. It really made my shitty morning turn into a pretty good day. I hope I never have to do the same for you guys (because I hope it never happens to you), but I will in a minute, if needed.

Anyway, I figured I get something else up here, so I wouldn’t have all that ugly right on the main page…

For Mother’s Day, we kept up our yearly tradition of heading to Seven Springs for brunch, then visiting a small animal park afterward. On the way there, we got off the exit and were waiting to make a left turn onto the road to take us there. And then some idiot in a Range Rover pulls up beside us on the right lane and proceeds to try and make a left turn ahead of us. I may have possibly used the words douchebag and asshole in front of my kids. On Mother’s Day. Mother. Of. The. Year.

So then we get to the resort and settle in to wait for a table. Luckily, we didn’t have to wait long. We weren’t in the main room, but we liked it that way, since it meant no one would be walking past and bumping us on their way to the buffet. The big thing on this buffet is the crab legs. I mean – there’s a lot of other good stuff, too, but I can eat potatoes and chicken and salad at home. I want the crab. We got our food and sat back down and our waitress stopped by to ask if we needed anything and I asked her if we could get some shell crackers for the crab. She said no. “Excuse me?” “Sorry, we don’t have any?” “You don’t have ANY?” “No – they took them to the conference center.” “Seriously? There are NO crackers in this entire place?” “Sorry.” “You’re telling me that today – during the Mother’s Day brunch that people come to from far and wide specifically for the crab legs, that you have no shell crackers??” “ Yeah, sorry.”

WTF? Mr b said he saw other people with them, so he ended up asking another waitress to get us some and she said sure. Unfortunately, our waitress heard him and piped up that they didn’t have any. But a couple of minutes later she came out with a pair, going on and on about how she found a pair and washed them for me. Hopefully not in the toilet.

In the midst of this drama, the host tried to seat a large party at a nearby table and we heard the guy raising his voice about how he didn’t want that table, he wanted a table in the main room. He wanted a window seat, dammit! They explained to him that 1) that the round window tables couldn’t accommodate his large party, and 2) if he wanted a table in the other room, he would have to wait a short while. But no, he wanted a table in the other room, not this table, and he wanted a window seat and he wanted it NOW. And he expected them to make people leave so he could have it. The answer of course was still no. I turned around at this point and what do you know, it was old Range Rover douchebag asshole. HA!

We went to the animal park next and saw some groovy critters, including this guy, who I look forward to seeing every year:

We also saw lots of goats, but NOT ONE of them fainted when I chased them. Goat FAIL.


Monday, I was driving home from work and I came to a stop sign. The women across from me waved me on, and then immediately gunned it right for me. At first, I thought maybe she was one of those insurance scammers who crate accidents, but then I figured it she were, she would have been more successful in the hitting me department, so now I think she was just an asshole. About two blocks later, I saw a guy wearing a baby

in a front carrier. Awww, right? Yeah, not so much. He was standing on a ladder. On a hill. On tiptoe. While reaching to trim the very top of his hedges with huge electric trimmers. It’s nice that there’s always someone out there who makes me feel like a parenting success.


Finally, the girl had her preschool graduation yesterday. She wanted curls which I knew wouldn’t last so I made sure to take a bunch of photos before they fell out. And I know I am biased, but she looked beautiful.

Afterward, we celebrated with a girly girl day. We went to tea, then came home and made perfume and flowery crafts. Then we lay in the hammock and relaxed. It was a good day.

See how fast the curls fell?

About sugarmag

Forty-sdjhfkjsdhfkjsdh year old mom of 2 - a 18 year old boy and a 11 year old girl. I love them very much, but they drive me crazy. I'm married and work full-time. I'm not sure which of these is the most exhausting, but probably the husband. I'm opinionated. I'm outspoken. I'm loud. I'm an over-sharer. I think Tom Cruise is a jackass. I like to say jackass. I like to swear, period. Fuckers. I love to read. I struggle with my weight. I love my job. I dress my pets up and ridicule them regularly. I am not afraid to cut my hair and I don't understand people who are. I hate getting old. I love to laugh. Make me laugh, OK?

9 responses »

  1. Seriously? On a ladder with a baby trimming the hedge? You must always carry a camera with you henceforth.For Mothers Day, i got the flu.:)

  2. She IS beautiful! I love that she has such a beautiful smile and actually smiles for you. Even with the douchebag driver and waitress, I hope you had a great Mother’s Day!

  3. Your daughter is so unbelievably gorgeous! You might be biased but you are correct. I love the polka dot dress. That whole Mother’s Day brunch incident would have infuriated me. Denied crackers? While eating crabs? What? No. Fucking. Way. My mother’s day dinner consisted of my husband’s sister yelling at their mother about being an alcoholic. So, I think I’d take your Mother’s Day, bitchy waitress and all, over mine.

  4. I love Douchebag Dude. I hope his waittress used the crab crackers on his nuts.Girl, next time you’re in the area give me a shout. We’re minutes from Seven Springs.

  5. I love that polka dot dress! Also, this makes me wonder if I should try to curl Monkey’s hair. Not that I have a curling iron, or that she will even allow me to put her hair in ponytails. But you know I like to torture myself with thoughts of what I can do to be a better mom.Sorry Seven Springs was not exactly on the ball this year. Hope you enjoyed the crab legs.ciao,rpm

  6. I love your stories but not the one about someone stealing your post … THAT.IS.AMAZING! I saw some tweets that I didn’t understand and NOW I do … Un-freakin-believable.Happy Belated Mom’s day – sounds like you had a fun time.And yes, your little girl is SOOOOO adorable. Precious in fact.

  7. Your daughter is SO beautiful! And, looks really familiar. Now, I’m convinced I taught her at some point.How did you find out someone stole the goat post? I always wonder about people stealing my posts, but how would I know?

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