This Week in Sports

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Football:

By now, everyone with even half a brain has heard about Ben Roethlisberger and his being accused (AGAIN) of sexual assault. It’s been talked about at length and it’s already been said way better than I could ever say it. But I’m gonna say it anyway:

Dear Ben: Are you fucking STUPID???

And I’m not even going to wait for his reply, because YES. Yes, he is stupid. In fact, I am starting to wonder if he was some sort of mental handicap. I was on his side the first time around – I know that the rich and famous are often the target of the greedy. And truthfully, I didn’t want it to be true. But when it happens a second time? It’s hard to not be at least a little concerned. I have no idea who is telling the truth, but I do know one thing. If he – a successful, rich, 28 year old man who can go anywhere he wants – wouldn’t have been hanging around in a college bar, with college kids, this particular incident would never have happened. He needs to grow up, get some class, and stop making idiot decisions.

And now we’re suddenly hearing his side of the story, which makes it worse – he claims that he did have “sexual contact” with this girl and afterward, she fell and hit her head.

WHAT? THE? FUCK?

If he truly is being falsely accused, then perhaps the last time he was falsely accused, he should have learned to never get himself in a situation where someone could accuse him of such a thing. Don’t pick up strange women in bars. Don’t follow them into dark and/or deserted hallways or bathrooms looking for a blow job. Get a damned posse to follow you around and never let you out of their sight. And if you need to get laid that bad: Hookers, Ben, HOOKERS! Look into it. God knows you have the money (or you do until that lawyer of yours starts sending the bills).

DUMBASS!

Hockey:

Have you heard? Sidney Crosby turned down an offer to appear on David Letterman, therefore blowing “a golden opportunity to give the NHL some much-needed exposure.” Really? Are we really going there? Dramatic much?Now I realize that hockey doesn’t always have the best ratings when compared to other sports, but let’s be honest here – there are 42,763 games per team per season (true story) – not everyone can watch them all. But given the 900 million merchandising dollars the NHL is pulling in each year, I’m going to go ahead and guess that hockey is going to be just fine.

Baseball:

Now I love The Blogger Formerly Known as PittGirl as much as anyone, and I appreciate her love for the Biggest, Fattest, Saddest, Most Depressing, Loseriest Losers Ever Pirates. But I don’t think this is the year. In fact, I’ll be surprised if this is even the decade. Therefore, I’ll be jumping on BurghBaby’s bandwagon (and supporting a great cause).

If you’re so inclined, pick a side and jump on board. Either way, you’ll be helping out some kids in need and you might win something in the meantime.

Go here if you think this is the year.

Go here if you read that and said HAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahaheeheeheeheh.

Do it for the kids!

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About sugarmag

Forty-sdjhfkjsdhfkjsdh year old mom of 2 - a 18 year old boy and a 11 year old girl. I love them very much, but they drive me crazy. I'm married and work full-time. I'm not sure which of these is the most exhausting, but probably the husband. I'm opinionated. I'm outspoken. I'm loud. I'm an over-sharer. I think Tom Cruise is a jackass. I like to say jackass. I like to swear, period. Fuckers. I love to read. I struggle with my weight. I love my job. I dress my pets up and ridicule them regularly. I am not afraid to cut my hair and I don't understand people who are. I hate getting old. I love to laugh. Make me laugh, OK?

One response »

  1. Yeah… I'm with ya on Big Ben. And all celebrities. The worst part is that the NFL brings in people to talk before the season about how to stay out of trouble. *sigh* Some people just shouldn't have that much money. Or celebrity. Or really much of anything. That or we shouldn't actually make them so much larger than life to begin with.

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