I’ve been crazy busy with work, snow days and sick kids, so it’s a meme day around here.
1. Have you ever felt alone, but yet there are people around you?
Yes – I have even written about it. It’s weird, though – sometimes it’s a very lonely feeling and yet sometimes I really love it. I think the lonely part comes in when I am in a group of people that I know and that know each other. Especially if I am an “outsider” in some way. I went through this a little in the early years with mr b. he comes form a HUGE family – six older sisters, they all have kids, their kids have kids, etc. Don’t get me wrong – they were always nice to me and tried to make me comfortable, but it can be overwhelming. I have pretty big family myself (extended, though – no siblings), which made it a little easier, but there were times that I still felt a little bit on the outside.
What I didn’t realize was that some of it was my own fault. Being an only child, I have always had the tendency to withdraw into my own thoughts, or bury my nose in a book, etc. I always have a book with me and when I would go to his family events, I would pull it out and start reading, which made me seem uninterested and unapproachable. In my defense, I did this at my own family events as well – it wasn’t personal – I just love to read. But admittedly, while it was mostly just that I can’t wait to get back to whatever I am reading, a tiny part of it was a defense mechanism – if I am busy reading, then I can’t feel awkward or left out – I’d rather read anyway.
Eventually, my SIL Weenie brought it up to me. she said that I always seemed like I didn’t want anything to do with them. I was really hurt and offended at first – I did want to be a part of their group, but I sometimes felt like they should make more effort. But I soon realized that she was right – that even though my motives were benign, I can see how they were perceived differently. So I stopped bringing the books and things changed. It’s been 18 years and I am sure glad I did. I no longer have sisters-in-law, but sisters.
On the other end of it, I love being all by myself and yet surrounded by people, like visiting a new city, or going to a restaurant, or a park, or a movie by myself.
2. Do you have any video game consoles? Which ones?
To be technical, my kids have them I don’t. PS2 and Wii. Plus the girl has a v-tech one. And they have PSP and DS.
3. Do you freak out at food warnings/outbreaks, such as the recent peanut butter salmonella scare?
Oh hell no. If I freaked out over that shit, the freakery would never end. Don’t get me wrong – It’s a concern and I will be sure to not give my kids tainted food. But Dear 8 Pound 6 Ounce Newborn Infant Jesus, don’t even know a word yet, I am so sick of the local news teasers about what’s lurking in my bathroom, or what’s in my lunch meat, or which restaurant got a warning, etc. I have enough to stress out about without adding that nonsense to the mix. As for the real stuff (like the PB recall), just use your head and be safe – no freaking out is needed. If you are freaking out over this stuff (unless your kids were eating a recalled product when you heard the news), then you seriously need to think about your need for drama. And maybe get a hobby.
4. What color/pattern is your beds’ comforter/bedspread?
I have beautiful blue and brown set on my bed, which I never get to enjoy. Mr b’s sever apnea/snoring have had me on the couch for years. When we started the never-ending addition/remodel, I found it at Marshall’s for a great price. When I bought it I was so excited about the price that I wasn’t even thinking about never really seeing it. So now I am thinking about taking it off the bed, because mr b lives like an animal back there and does not deserve a beautiful bed.
5. How many windows do you have in your house?
We have (I think) 21 windows, and 2 giant, four panel sliding doors.
6. Name six things that are in your bathroom.
Sink, toilet, bathtub, mr b’s underwear from Monday, mr b’s underwear from Tuesday, mr b’s underwear from Wednesday.
7. How big is your garage? Should it be bigger?
I don’t have a garage, so yes, it should be MUCH bigger.
8. Got your taxes done yet?
Nope. I don’t even have my W-2s yet. But I do like to get them done early. The past few years, we haven’t, though.
9. Think of a mental disorder….. why did you think of that particular one?
Bipolar disorder. Because lately there have been radio ads running for a bi-polar study.